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100 Sad Days; Day 38: Black Days and Mondays

The Carpenters said it was Rainy Days and Mondays but hey...

A very good friend of mine recently asked what do I do on my black days and it got me thinking. What do I do on days when I just want to curl up under my duvet and never wake up? On days when I want to cry myself to sleep and hide from the world. When I want to creep into my lair and just stay there?

Sometimes I do just that. However that is a luxury, how many of us are able to just forget about the world? Sometimes we go off the rails and we do just that we get so caught up in our own misery we forget the people around us. However I am talking of the dark days when you are still trudging along pretending to yourself and the world that it's all ok. 

So what do we do? What do I do? I try to step outside my bubble. To realise that there is a me and a world and we are able to live symbiotically. 

I think the key is remembering you. Reminding yourself that you are a person in your own right. Not just mummy or daddy, sister or brother, shoulder to cry on, child or parent, lover or friend. You are you. Nobody is better at being you as you are. In fact, at this precise moment you are perfect at being you; how can you not be?

Are you able to spare yourself a few minutes and a cup of tea? Put the kids in front of the tv, close the door, be you for a small amount of time. Or maybe someone can have them for half an hour or an hour? Go and get a coffee, chat to strangers, window shop. Make no arrangement other than to be you and to be happy in your own skin. 

Then when you return be firm and fair. If you are not coping or you are feeling yourself slip just remind yourself and those around you that you are having a down day and that should help them to step away. 

I find taking myself out of a situation is the best route but understand it isn't always possible. As much as we try to "close the door" on children in a room, or have five minutes peace in the bath, it never really happens because they are always there in our subconscious. 
I am trying meditation this year to give me somewhere to escape to, even if only for five minutes a day, a space that is all mine. When I first wake up, or when everyone else is asleep. Just some me time. A calm place of my own. 

Maybe if you work you can get a moments peace in your car before you start your day, or in a coffee shop on the way, if the kids are at school and you are at home, take some time before staring your chores. 

Just remember you are you. Chesney Hawkes had it right you know "No one can be myself like I am for this job in the best man."

Be you. Be perfectly you. 

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